Wednesday, August 30, 2006
2 days ago, I had a nightmare. I'm not sure about what it's trying to tell me, although I do have interpreted it somehow..
Anyway, in my dream, I (or a girl, or boy. but I'll say it as 'I') attented this party where everyone wore formal attire. I'm not sure whether it was a tuxedo or a dress. Then there someone that I knew and he was performing on stage. I have forgotten what performance it was but I think it was kinda good, cuz I remember that the audience was clapping their hands.
However, there was something that we should not do. We were warned on not to do that beforehand. I think it was something got to do with embarrassment. Then something happened and this boy was on the floor, crawling without his attire on. He was also crying and the audience were laughing at him, except for me. I was there thinking "what a dumb thing to do" or something along that line and then I shouted to him saying something about he should not do that.
After that, a girl went on the stage to perform. I'm not sure whether the girl was me or not. Maybe not. And then I think she was delivering a speech or something like that. However, sadly, she forgot her line at this point of time and her mum was really angry. Her mum then took out a cane and caned her on the spot, in front of the whole audience, which was very shocking! I was stunned!
The girl pleaded mercy and cried her eyes out but for some reason, I do not know what, her mum continued to cane her as though her dissatisfaction was that great. Then the worst part comes. Suddenly, blood started squirting out of the girl's skin. It was as though her mum caned her too hard that she bled. What's more, she was caned on her face too and the scene was horrible. Because of the terrible pain, the girl cried even louder than seh was before.
But I think that her crying actually made her mum even more frustrated that she vented her anger on everyone and she started whippping everything around her, including the audience. The audience, of course, fleed. All afraid of the, now berserk, mum. And then the girl passed away or something like that. I can't remember cuz by then I'm awake. It was really really FREAKY!!
I do not know HOW it come about. Especially why do I have such a nightmare? Is there a special meaning to it?? I've been thinking about it for quite some time now.. But I guess that I'll never find out the answer so soon.. I guess that I'll just have to wait, huh.
Alright, this shall be the end of this entry. Although it's been such a long time, I think this is the highlight that I would like to share most. Although, today, I had another freaky thing happened to me - I had a white hair!! O______O ARRGGGHHHHH!!!! But note that it's A only.. So yeah.. Got rid of it. Sigh.. Must be because I'm under too much stress. Well, alright then. Good night!!! =]
whispers at
11:34 PM
Monday, August 14, 2006
Hmm?? What the.. How come a post of mine is gone...?? Sigh.. It's okay.. Many things have happened but I really do not know where to start.. There's the Fu Hua Sec students, haha.. Losers. And then my problem.. I guess I shall just fast forward everything from the 7th of August. huh.
Well, yesterday.. My dream.. It's trying to tell me something. But I don't know what.. I really have this feeling that it's trying to tell me something. I slept at about 7 and that's when I started dreaming.. In my dream,
I woke up from my nap and there I was, in my old bedroom in my Jakarta house. Just like the old days.. Those days that I missed so much.. But the me there was me in the present. Only my surrounding actually changed to the past. It's as though I actually time travelled. Then I looked around me, still feeling kinda shocked. Then I stood up and went outside of my room.
Everything was still the same.The piano, the aquarium.. Ah.. It had its light on. And the living rooms, they were dimly lighted.
Then I procceeded to the dining table and there my tuition teacher was. The tuition teacher that I'm currently having tuition with. Then I think said something like let's have our lesson now. And so we started. Then suddenly, I realise that I'm no longer in Indo.. I was on the living room of my Singapore's.. And I was kinda tired and sleepy. Then I told her that maybe we should stop for today and then continue another time..
Then I got ready to bathe.. I took my towel and when I got into my room to get my clothes, I saw her there in my room somehow lying on the bed. I saw her dog.. And then there was her mom if I'm not wrong. And then there's supposedly her dad. But I see my grandpa instead. He was really active, doing some magic tricks if I'm not wrong. And then yeah.. The air-con was on and the yellow light was on, as though getting ready for someone to sleep. And then I also see my siblings and my cousins..
Then I just took my clothes and when into the toilet to bathe. suddenly something came up. I forgot what it was. And then I woke up.
This dream is still quite vivid in my mind until now. And I've not told anyone about it yet. Cuz I'm not sure whether i should, or not. And the last thing that I saw before waking up.. What's that?? It's really vague now.. Can't seem to recall it.. And everything, all the scenes just make me kinda.. I dunno.. Sad? There's this feeling of missing in me. Like as though I miss my childhood a lot.. Or something.. And then I just gotta come to reality and face it, ya know.
But what really made that dream? Was it me? Was it because of myself? Because I think that I've been under pressure or something? Or is it telling me something? Like maybe, I should give myself a break, thing of my happy moments and all those stuff? Oh yeah, and of course, my parents were there as well.. It's as though it's trying to show me all the people that are very dear me but just can't show me all of them because I didn't give it enough time to unfold itself..
And then when I woke up.. I've been kinda thinking about it.. And then it made me realise.. There's this ShinHwa concert coming up in Singapore on the 10th of Sept like I said earlier.. And It costs quite a bomb.. $168 for each tic.. And then I've been trying to save up money and then asking my mum for permission to go for it.. But then after this dream, it got me thinking.
Is it actually trying to tell me "Stop! Don't go for it! Remember your happy childhood times when you can afford many things.. They're not what you are right now. You've got to understand your parents' situation and be more thoughtful!" That's what I've bene thinking about.. What's more.. It seems like I've either spent or lost some 30 bucks that I've tried to save earlier on..
And seriously, is it just to show me that I'm not meant to do so? My sis is no longer going for it as well.. So I guess I shan't.. My mum called just a moment ago. She sounded really sad. But instead of making her feel better and so on.. I actually asked her if she'll allow me to go for the concert. What kind of a daughter am I? I've finally come to this conclusion after reflecting on whatever that I've done. She must have felt really sad. And I dunno.. I'm supposed to comfort her! Just feel really dissapointed in myself right now. She was coughing as well.. She's sick.. Because of too much work.. And she couldn't come because of the work too.. And misses us here.. But she sacrifices herself for the work, for our sake. I'm so selfish!!!!
Sigh.. I'll find some time and try to apologize to her I guess.. And the Ms Tan also talked to me yesterday.. Saying that I've grown as days passed by.. I hope that I really did.. So yeah.. Okay, enough of those sad thingys.. It's time for me to rejoice!!! =]
Tomorrow there's planting.. Hope it goes well!! X_____X Hehhehe.. And yeah.. There was band.. Not gonna write much I guess.. REally have many feelings now adays.. Hahah.. Guess she's coming XD hehehe..Ok ok.. Nytzz~~
whispers at
11:11 PM
Monday, August 07, 2006
Aisshh!!! I'm so forgetful!! I can' use that smiley face.. And yet i still used them! X___x Alright, shall stop those from now on.
Anyway, today is kinda eventful.. I was called to the Vice-Principal (VP)'s office first thing in the morning. LOL! Great, huh? But I didn't have to go there straight away, of course. Well, as I've guessed earlier, it was on te issue of the KL trip. Huahuhauhauhahah!!
I thought that she would actually believe all of that teacher's words or something and then scold us through and through.. ut she didn't! ^^ Oh, how glad!! Hehhe.. She's so fun!! Love her lots =) Hehehehhe I was totally wrong when I thought that it'll be a dread or something.. But instead, it turned out to be really fun! ^^ Had lots of laughters there~ =]
And then the great me starts my STM again.. I forgot my COURT SHOES!! Well, I thought that we need that on Tuesday only.. But it turned out that we need it today too!! X___X How annoying!!! Sigh...
But just now, it wasn't so bad. I mean, we did rehearse and it went fine.. XD Hmm.. Got punished for forgetting the shoes- 30 lines
And another sad news.. QPS!!! WHY?!?!?! Their band was closed down.. Knew bout this news not long ago.. At about 5 PM? Sighhh~~~ SO SADDDD!!!!!!
Well, tomorrow is the performance.. Gotta remember those XD Thnx Husna!! And the others too! =] Hehehe~ Alright then.. Shall end here now ^^ Cyaa~~~
whispers at
7:00 PM
Thursday, August 03, 2006
Haha.. Speaking of tiredness.. I'm so tired!! I havent even checked my homework for today >____<>
Whatever it is, I'll just have to fix it later.. And then today we had practice for the NDP performance. Lots of songs sang. Was really bored.. So I joined in with the singing.. Quite fun at some parts. And then the foreigners' performance.. Hehe! The opening of it was kinda funny! ^^
And then when I was having band just now, Shen lao shi called me.. No, in fact, she called me since the middle of my lessons just now!! at 1.30++?? @_@ I was having my mother tongue man.. Scary~~ and then during band too..
Then I found out what's up with her. Turned out to be that she had changed her maid.. Her old one tried to steal. Sighh.. And then the new one knows english and chinese not. And that's why she needed a Cindy-to-the-rescue thing. -____-'' Haha! But it wasn't that bad anyways XDD Well, I was able to eat at her place.. Really delicious foods!! Love ShangHai delicacies.. And then My tummy was full! It's still full now >___<>
Hmm.. anyhow, today was kinda fun.. Being a translator is really not an easy job. I've always thought of it being a fun, easy job. But I changed my mind! ^^;; Hehehe..
Oh.. And.. SHINHWA'S COMING TO SINGAPORE ON THE 10TH OF SEPTEMBER!! OMGOSH OMGOSH!!!! XDDDXDDXDD I'm SOOOOO excited about it!!! Wonder if I'm allowed to go for it.. And then Monji!!!! Sigghhh... STATE OF THE ART!!!! TT_TT hmmm... Hope that everything will turn out fine and the way we want them to.. Yeah?
Aight aight.. This'll be the end for today.. CANT WAIT!! >___<>
whispers at
1:02 AM
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Sheezz.. Speaking of long.. How many months have it been? Anyway, it's due to the long holiday, and the fact that my comp had broken down. But it's alright now ^^ it's fixed! although nowhere near perfection.. He he but it's okay~
Glad that you guys still remember me after such a long time.. Hmm.. some tags on the board tells me so ^^; (I hope I'm right, that is) but anyhow, this is a journal of my life, huh.
Sigh. Tests coming up.. Lots of them. Attacking me slowly, bit by bit, almost painfully. Not really, though. Just that I found out some new things going on.. And it sure did explain to me why the seniors have been talking about "conflicts" some things that are definitely off-limits to the sec1s. but yeah, I know.
Why do some things happen? We do not know. Why don't things go the way we want them to be? Perhaps it makes our lives more challenging this way, too challenging sometimes. Why are some truths still hidden somewhere at the bottom of something? Maybe that's the way it should be. Why ask yourself so many questions when you know that you can't answer them? Now that's the humans' nature. You can't fight it, can you?
My life has been full od ups and downs too. Like everyone else. Except, not many people noticed it. Nobody lives a perfect life. We should learn to understand and care. Why hurt when you will hurt yourself more than you hurt others? Why assume and conclude without knowing anything much? Well, you will never know unless you have the heart to wait and find out.
So many things have happened. So much work to do. But instead of sighing all day long, I shall learn on how to look forward, I guess. I wonder what people think about me. Cuz.. Forget it. She sucks. That's it. No use blabbering on about her. It'll be a waste of my time and a waste of my effort.
Anyway, leaving all the other things aside, these are the events that
I've Completed So Far:
"My Home" Percussion Concert
Are On-Going:
"Many Ways of Seeing" D&T Worksop
Project Catwalk
Are Up-coming;
National Day Parade Concert
"CCP"
Tests:
Done:
History
English
Mother Tongue
Home Economics
Coming-up:
Geography
Well, I guess that's it? Haha.. Sorry. Not much updated. Too many things have happened. It'll be a novel if I were to write everything down.. Haha!! Oh.. And everyone! Try listening the a Jap Band named DA PUMP ^^ c yaazzz
whispers at
10:24 PM